Yesterday I got schooled by a two-year-old.
Kingston got some little foam traffic cones from the MINI dealership last week. So he’s been setting up road blocks and tracks for his cars. Then for some weird reason, yesterday morning he took a bite out of one of them. So of course, I made him throw away the piece he bit off but didn’t think much more of it. Then a few minutes later he walked up to me and said, “Say I’m sorry.” I was like WHAT DID YOU DO? (Because that’s what he says when he’s done something bad and doesn’t want us to find out.) He said, “I ate the cone.” Unfortunately, I’m not good with the whole staying calm thing. I was immediately yelling, “Where is the cone? Did you really eat it? Is it in your tummy? You’re going to get sick!” He just smiled. SMILED!
I started getting mad on top of freaking out like a crazy person. I called Anderson and told him, and he laughed. What is wrong with these people? This is not funny! He was like, “Lyndsay. He did not eat the cone.” I told him that I was sure he did. I had already seen him take a bite out of it. And he told on himself like he does when he knows he’s going to be in trouble. This is so our luck. Our kid won’t even eat chicken nuggets, but he’ll eat a toy traffic cone. Then I asked if he thought I should take him to the doctor? Make him throw up? WHAT DO I DO? I was certain it was poisonous. It was made in China! He just said, “Put me on speaker phone.” Then he asked Kingston where the cone was and Kingston said it was in his belly. Anderson said “Take Mamma to the cone.” So he made this big production of walking me all over the house pretending to look for it. Finally he said, “I think it’s under the couch.” Yep. There it was. Under the couch. With two big chunks bitten out of it. Not sure if he ate the second piece, but I made my own big production of throwing that thing away. While Kingston laughed. He was so proud of himself. Great. I have a liar on my hands.