It’s time for our monthly blog circle, and I started to just share some fun pictures of us at the beach and keep things really light like I normally do. But it just didn’t feel right to say “Oh hey! This is what our March looks like!” when it’s not a true representation of our world right now. Also, this is a good way for me to share with some of our friends, because I certainly can’t talk about it face to face without crying. Basically, I’m in a constant state of getting ready to cry, crying, or finishing up a good cry. So I’m going to unload a bit of heavy stuff. You can just skip down to the fun pictures if you prefer. π And make sure you check out Wynne Elder’s blog, “Glorious Ruined” after you read this to make your way through the blog circle. She’s an amazing woman who shares her faith and has been a huge encouragement to me!
I mentioned in a few previous posts that February was a tough month, and that sentiment has continued into March. I really wanted to wait and share this story with you when we had some resolution, but I’ll just have to write about it in chapters. We will call this first one “Holy crap. Now what?” We’ve known that Anderson’s job was a bit unstable for a while. Working for a government contractor has a lot of uncertainties tied with it. But one thing is certain: when government budgets are cut, you’re one of the first on the chopping block. Anyway, he worked for the same company for a bout 5 years, and during that time we had some close calls. A few “hold your breath that this bill passes” moments. So when I first heard about the sequestration I wasn’t surprised. But towards the end of February it became pretty clear to us that this time was for real. Budgets were going to be cut drastically. We got the official news on February 28th that Anderson, along with 180,00 other people in Florida, had no job. Just like that. We were at dinner with some friends that night, and our cell phones immediately started buzzing with friends and family reaching out to offer support. And the friends we just happened to be with that night shared an encouraging story about a rough time they went through a few years ago. It was amazing listening to how God took care of them every step of the way and now they can look back and see how it played into his plan for their lives. We had set the date to be with them that night long before we knew what was going to happen, but God knew exactly where we needed to be.
Until this point we’ve lived a very comfortable life together and have never had to worry about finances. At all. And thankfully we were able to save a lot when we were first married and both working full-time jobs. But the uncertainty of not having our main source of income is still knock-the-breath-out-of-me scary. It’s weird because I have moments were I totally freak out. Totally. Hence the daily crying routine! But overall I feel a peace that I can’t explain. And an excitement, because I know that God allowed this to happen for a reason. That doesn’t make each day any easier though. And knowing lots of people involved in the lay off on a personal basis just makes the whole thing even messier. Lots of emotions involved. I have to remind myself multiple times every day that God is bigger than any person or any company, and he sees the whole picture. Part of my fear is wrapped up in not having any control over the situation. But the truth is, we never have control. Just the illusion of it.
Through this whole mess God has been so good to us. Of course he has! He promises to honor faithfulness, and he has in so many ways over the last three weeks. We decided to keep tithing like we always have (10% of our income) to our church, but the first week was scary. I usually get really excited about giving, but that day I DID NOT want to write the check. For the first time in our marriage we were giving totally based on faith; not convenience. But I did write the check, and God turned around and blew our minds. The same day a friend gave me a card with some money inside. It was EXACTLY the amount we had just tithed. Then the next week we gave again, and another friend (2 of them actually) gave us a huge bag of our favorite goodies and gift certificates to some of our favorite restaurants. And guess how much the certificates added up to? Yep, the exact amount we had tithed again! Can you believe that? Then on the third week we gave (and by this time I had no problem writing the check!), and the next day we got an anonymous card in the mail with more gift certificates. But this time they were more than we gave, so I guess we have to up our gift. π And each person has said that they felt like God wanted them to do something for us. They had no way of knowing how much we were giving or how scared we were about it. Our God is amazing, and we know this is his way of giving us a big hug and reminding us that he’s got this. We have nothing to worry about. He didn’t have to. It should be enough that he promises to take care of us, but I needed a reminder and he gave me one. There are so many other ways he’s done this. Even my devotion every day has been about something I was desperate to hear from his Word. More crying! Our friends have been great too (one even dropped by our house one night with a Brazilian flan!), and of course my parents have been amazing.
I want to be totally honest though. This process sucks. God is amazing and good, but life is hard sometimes. It’s not an either/or thing. Sometimes it’s both. And it’s okay to admit that. Or to freak out or to ask questions. That doesn’t mean we don’t trust God. It just means we’re human. In the midst of all the job mania I’ve been going through some medical testing too. I spent yesterday morning at a neurologist office. Oh, and being in the middle of testing means insurance companies don’t want to accept you. So… yeah. This is tough. One thing after another. But God is writing this story, and for the first time in my life I’m willing to do anything he tells me to do. Same with Anderson. He’s molding us into the people he wants us to be. The family he wants us to be. Because he has a plan. And that’s where the excitement kicks in again.
We’re just along for the ride.
GIRL! FIRST! The tithing- and the gifts. Amazing! I was in tears over here! That is awesome! He is so faithful and will always provide! I’m glad He decided to have those people bless you guys like that! That is awesome!
SECOND- I am in prayer over this for y’all. I know a spouse losing a job is scary! We’ve done it before too. But like you said, GOD is in control…always is, even when we feel like WE are sailing the ship, HE IS. Thankfully.
THIRD- these pictures are fabulous! As always. Y’all are just the most beautiful family! Inside & out! I can see the light and love shine throughout each one of you! That picture of Anderson reaching through to Kingston- I LOVE IT! And I can feel the strenth of your marriage through your writing! It’s an inspiration girl.
HOLD TIGHT! You’ve got LOTS OF GOOD going on right now, even though there’s that one big bad spot, there’s tons of good. LOVE YOU GIRL!!!!!!
Annie, You are SO right. Thank you for praying and for the pep talk. π I’m so thankful for you!
Lyndsay –
A lot of times people are too afraid to share the hard times in their life and choose to put on a faΓ§ade for everyone. So, it is always so refreshing to read your blog and the honesty you share. Your faith and honesty inspires other – sometimes without you even knowing. Thank you for being you!
We will keep you and your family in our thoughts!!!
Whitney
Whitney, You are always so encouraging and I appreciate your honesty too! Sometimes it’s easier for me to put on a fake smile, but no one benefits from that. Not even me!
Beautiful images! I wish we could have this weather all year long!!! π
Hey Valerie! Thank you. So glad you’re doing the blog circle… and that your blog has an English translation. I’m a little slow over here! π
I am so proud of you Lyndsay! What an encouragement to others. I am praying for you guys and just continue to be faithful and know that God is your source for everything.
Thank you so much Michelle. That means a lot right now!
So awesome to see God’s provisions in action. I’m so sorry that you are going through this struggle. It’s so encouraging to see you still tithing. How, so many people even in good times feel they don’t have the means to tithe and you guys are living proof of God’s faithfulness. I understand the crying.
We will be praying for you guys, and the upcoming months for some answers financially, job-wise, and for your health.
-Ashley
P.S. So great that your month pictures are at one of God’s greatest gifts, especially those struggling financially. I love that we can experience one of God’s most beautiful creations, the beach, for free!
Ashley, I so appreciate the prayers! And how true about the beach. I hadn’t even thought about it like that!!
Wow what a testimony to God’s providance! I’m sorry you are going through such a rough time but how great that you can see God’s love through all of this! Thanks for being bold and sharing your story. I’ll be praying for you and your fam!
Thanks so much Jen!!!
Oh my heart aches and breaks for you only because I have been in your same shoes. It’s so hard, tough, lots of tears and you’re normal to feel everything you are feeling. My heart rejoices for you for what God is going to do in your life, and in your family through this. Everything can be redeemed when you lay it before the Lord. I have seen that to be true. Prayers for you my friend, you’re brave to share your story this is just another thing to give glory to God.
Andrea, You’re so sweet. Always! It’s always encouraging to hear from someone who has been there. Thank you!!
Well said, Girl! Believing and stumbling and crying buckets along with you. The reasons are different, but pain abounds. And our Comforter abounds greater still! What a gift to know that He sifts and searches out our paths. Loving and praying for you guys! And holding onto this:
**May the God of your hope so fill you with all joy and peace in believing [through the experience of your faith] that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound and be overflowing (bubbling over) with hope.(Rom 15:13**
Jennifer, Life is hard! Why didn’t anyone tell me that? π Thanks for sharing the truth. Joy and Peace!
Such an amazing and inspiring woman you are, Lyndsay. I’m so glad that your faith is being strengthened through this trying time. I pray your transition will be an easy one. Much love coming to you from Utah! xoxo
Thanks Cass! I feel the love. :)))
Thank you for your honest testimonial, Lyndsay. This is, without a doubt, one of your best blog entries. The pictures are superb, as usual, too.
Ginger, That’s so sweet! Anderson took most of these pics, so I’ll tell him you said that!!!
Lyndsay,
Thank you so much for your candid honesty and for sharing your journey. And you are so very right.. the process does suck at times :0)! But what an awesome God we have who is there with us throughout the whole process and so very faithful to us. And so are so many others who love you both. I pray strength for you and Anderson for the journey and a renewed passion for Christ and all He has for you. I pray for Anderson’s job and your health.. that God is truly glorified in all. Thank you for letting us see Jesus in you honey.
Thank you for praying. That means a lot, because I know you will!!
I know God is using you, Anderson and your precious son thru this journey of life. I can tell you that Lori & Kendell & their girls went thru this life journey once and it drew them closer together and stronger in the Lord. Family & friends provided for them too. God always knows what we need and when times of trouble come He is always there. Just Trust and Obey for there is no other way!
Thanks Mrs. Carol! I smiled when I read what you wrote, because “Trust and Obey” is one of Kingston’s favorite songs. π
I’m 58 and Mom’s however old she wants to be.;) We’ve been believers for many years. We’ve been married 34 years. We have been blessed beyond measure but frankly, there have been times we’ve walked through hell and back. But, God has been ____________________________. Fill in the blanks with any positive descriptive terms or phrases. He’s all that and so much more. I don’t pretend to understand it all. Sometimes nothing seems to make sense but God _________________________.
Remember what we’ve always taught y’all – God is faithful and He blesses faithfulness. It’s OK to yell, cry, and scream. He’s big enough to handle it. If He wasn’t, I’d be a pile of ashes by now. I love you.
I love you Pop. Yep, God is ____________!!!
hi, i just found your blog through cass miller’s and love it. i absolutely love this post on God’s faithfulness. such an amazing testimony of when we obey. may God bless your family in full!
btw – i love this project of what your month looks like. such a great way to document the days of each month with your family!
Love you my sweet!!! You’re in our hearts, minds and prayers. XOXO!
You are amazing! I admire your lovely faith and trust in God. I am so sorry to hear all that you are going through, but I know that what you say is true, about putting it all in God’s hands and trusting what He has in store for us. Thank you for sharing your beautiful words, it helps to remind us all that life is not always gonna be peachy and when it does get rough who will we turn to and what will our attitudes towards it tell us? I was so happy to hear the little miracles behind you paying your tithe, that is truly amazing and God sent π Blessings to you and your lovely family!
xoxo,
Shio
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