Many of you know that I’ve been dealing with some health issues since early this year. I’ve chosen not to talk about it much here for several reasons. The biggest one is because I just don’t want to focus on it. And although there are days/weeks when it pretty much consumes my thoughts and schedule (lots of dr. visits), I don’t feel like my life revolves around it. So I don’t want to give you that impression. Also, last time I talked about it I definitely over-shared. And I got a lot of frustrating, discouraging and just plain weird messages from people who knew what was wrong with me. Lots of “I bet you have ____ or “I had an aunt with similar symptoms, so you should get checked for _____ or “I had a dream that you had ______.” And while I know these were meant to be helpful, they just weren’t. At all. And I don’t want to go through the emotional roller coaster of thinking I have the weird illness someone’s dog once had again. 🙂 So I’m keeping the details more private for now. The other reason I haven’t said much lately is because we just don’t know anything for sure.
But I mentioned on Facebook last week that I was having another test and so many of you offered words of support, so I hate to leave you completely in the dark. Your support means so much to me and Anderson. We totally believe in prayer, so I want you to know enough to be able to pray specifically.
Yesterday afternoon I got the results from my most recent brain scan, and they weren’t good. But they also weren’t definitive. Basically I need more tests. We also feel very strongly that we need a second opinion. So we’re currently trying to pull some strings at one of the best hospitals in the country (that happens to be a few miles from our house) to get me in with their Neurology team ASAP. Please pray for favor with that, because the current waiting list is 6 months. I believe that God has allowed some frustrating events to happen with my current doctor just to lead us to this different group and am thankful that we can see his hand working even during this scary time. He has and continues to be our strength.
Ironically, I feel great physically. Other than lots of stress! But emotionally (and spiritually?) I’m exhausted. Last night was one big pity party with lots of crying and, “What the hell, God?” I even refused to pray over dinner. So basically Anderson ate with 2 two-year-olds. 🙂 But God is big enough to handle me acting like a spoiled brat. And this morning I woke up to the real toddler in the house singing at the top of his lungs:
“Bless the Lord, oh my soul
Oh, my soul
Worship his holy name
Sing like never before
Oh, my soul
I’ll worship your holy name.”
I’m so thankful that his mercies are new each morning, and he is always faithful. Even when I doubt him and refuse to thank him for my chicken teriyaki.
Kingston and I went and had donuts for lunch today. The whole time he kept yelling, “I love donuts!” So it might be the sugar high, but we feel better now.
ADDED: Not even 5 minutes after I posted this I got a call from THE hospital saying they can see me THIS Monday. God is so good!
I’m praying sister. Praying hard for this. Praying you get a quick IN with the second opinion and praying also for complete healing and that whatever was seen in this test will be unseen on the future test. Praying hard sister.
Second. You are completely normal. No, it’s not best to question God, but WE ARE HUMAN and that’s what WE do. We fall short. But he offers grace, sometimes in the form of singing toddlers or even sugar filled donuts. But it’s grace nonetheless.
Third- that is my ALL TIME FAVORITE praise and worship song. Easton LOVES for me to sing it to him! Sometimes he’ll put the ipod in his ears and sings along. His little voice is so precious singing that. is there anything better than hearing your toddler worship?!?! I THINK NOT!
I’ll be praying sister. You know I will! Love you bunches!!!!!
I know you will, and I appreciate it so much. And I love that song too! Maybe K and E need to start a band. 🙂
Sometimes, we have to act like the other two year old in the house just to blow off some steam. 😉 Continuing to lift you up in prayer! We all trust and know that God’s in complete control. (((Hugs))) to you and your sweet family. <3
Ha! Jennifer, that’s the truth. Thank you for praying!
Lyndsay, thanks for sharing… i will pray for you. I don’t need details, just knowing that you need prayer is enough…PS– those doughnuts looked amazing
Thank you so much! And they were. You NEED one!!!
Praying, praying hard! If you were referring to Mayo, I am so happy you were able to get in to see them. My SIL is currently undergoing chemo for Ewing’s Sarcoma and she has been having a very good experience over there. We know many of the team members and they have a wonderful praying staff as well. You will be in good hands. God is good always and will be with you every step of the way, as well as I have no doubt that your church family and “social media” family will be behind you too. Thank you for keeping us updated.
Ashley, Thank you so much for praying. I’m overwhelmed by the sweet words of encouragement from so many people today. Thank you for taking the time to write. It means A LOT!!
Dear Lyndsay:
I am certainly praying for you and your two guys, who happen to be my son and grandson!
I know that God never loses, He is righteous in all his ways and worthy on all His works. I want to avoid the “clichê” of saying God has a plan in this situation and blah, blah blah, because, when you slice it and dice it, these phrases don’t do much to help; they only provide a temporary jolt of “positive” thinking. Faith however, is more than positive thinking. Faith is believing that whatever God does, allows, or whatever verb you want to add after the word God, He does it and in the end it works out for our good.
I am so happy that you are not focused in what you feel! That’s probably the highest point of faith when we don’t focus on what we feel but on what we believe! God will honor your faith! God sees things from end to the beginning as the Bible says and everything is in his hands.
I am praying for you, aching where you ache, crying where you cry, pouting where you pout so I can have bragging rights to rejoice when you rejoice!
Oh, and don’t worry, God doesn’t mind a little tantrum… If you don’t want to pray over dinner, bleh, He knows it… He won’t frown! He loves you! Just tell Anderson to pray; after all, you’re one with him!
If you need any personal prayer, count on this old man. Besides everything that I said I am doing with you, I also want to pray with you!
Blessings!
Your Dad-in-Law,
Milt
Milton, I’m so glad you’re my father-in-law! Thank you for loving me and praying for me and “the boys” and for always encouraging us. We love you!!!
Sending you a hug and a smile 🙂
Hey Lana! Thank you!!
Continuing to pray for you and your sweet family Lindsey. Thank you for sharing the realness of you and how God’s love and mercy keeps on and on. Love you!!!
Thank you for praying! I’m excited about your new journey!!!
Thank you, Lord for giving us the blessing of sweet children who make us laugh and sing praises in the most difficult days! Praying with you, friend! Please let K come and visit us anytime in the coming weeks! We LOVE him! I love you!<3
Love you too, JoJo! And you KNOW I will. 😉
Ok – I want to have lunch with you and Kingston! That looks like the coolest lunch ever!! You do know the King Jehoshaphat sent the worship team out before the warriors and by the time the soldiers showed up the battle was history! Kingston obviously knows that story!
I completely forgot about that story! Maybe he learned it at church recently?!? 🙂
Great news! But I reallywant to know where you got the tat for the 2yr old…he must be hanging with some wild peers! 🙂 He is so cute. I love to read your blogs; really look forward to them and your pictures! Praying His peace over you.
Thank you so much, Mrs. Sally. And I know what you mean. I really need to keep an eye out on his friends… those Miller boys are quite the pair. :)))
Praying for you! Love you!
Thanks Mrs. B!!!! Love you too. 🙂
I am so glad they are getting you in and I am praying for you.
Thanks Mrs. Carol!
PTL! (Praise the LORD) love ya’ll so much!
Praying for you Lyndsay! I know God has a big plan and there must be some doctor or nurse along the way who needs to meet you and your unwavering faith.
Whitney! That’s the sweetest comment. Thank you! And if that’s the case, bring ’em on!!!!
PRAYING lyndsay! praying for peace, strength, understanding and healing! God knows your heart and he doesn’t mind fits being thrown. sometimes i find my conversations with God not really being conversations… just me pitching a fit about something.
and praise the Lord for answered prayer already. we’ll be saying a special prayer monday! xoxo
Thanks so much , Ab! And you’re right… he knows our hearts. The good and the bad!
Well, you did it. My eyes are glistening with tears after reading how Kingston sang and touched your heart. I pray that God continues to give you nudges of encouragement, moments that make you smile and the warmth of holding your hand through it all. I love you Lyndsay and will be praying for you.
Praying for you and I believe also that our GOD is so much bigger and can heal. Many prayers coming your way!!!
Thanking God for answered prayers from the hospital and we’ll be praying for your appointment Monday. God will work this for your good and know this … I am proof positive that God can take our hissy fits (but, I’ll usually double up on my thankfulness for donuts!) Love & prayers, CJ 🙂
Ha! I’m with you Cecilia!!!! Thank you for praying!
Started following you years ago on Flickr. I liked our photography and followed your blog now. My wife and I both do. We let each other know when something new is up on the blog. We are both praying for you.
Hey Barry! Good ‘ole Flickr!!! Thank you so much for praying. Please thank your wife too!!
Aw luv I didn’t realize anything was going on – somehow missed that.
Just grateful that Jesus is there for you, and he has all the RIGHT words for you to bring calm to where all the WRONG ones were spoken. People can be so insensitive. I pray he speaks to you of his promises for you and for your family. He will not disappoint!
Katie-THANK YOU! You’re so right. He never gets it wrong. 🙂
God is so GOOD even in the tough times! Thanks for sharing your heart! Praying for you girl! XOXOXO
Hey Tiff! I’ve been praying for you too. You are such a brave mama!!!
I’m so out of the loop! Just read all 3 entries about your current situation with tears streaming down my face. Definitely puts things into perspective for someone like me who frequently has pity party’s about the little things.
I wish you the best of luck on this rocky journey and will keep you and your beautiful family in my thoughts and prayers!
xo Sarah
Sarah! Thank you so much. And I think we all do that sometimes!!
sending out a prayer for you today.
Thanks for the update. Just wanted to let you know that David and I are still praying for you, and will continue to do so. Hope all goes well with your next tests…..
We are praying for you. Nothing is impossible with JESUS.